Rob Storrs

Act II, page 27


JACK.    I shall pay this bill for my brother.  And it is the last bill I shall ever pay for him, too.  How much?

GRIBSBY. £762, 14, and tupence.  Ah, the cab will be 5 & 9 pence extra, hired for the convenience of the client.

JACK.    Of course.  Payable to “Parker and Gribsby, Solicitors”?

MISS PRISM.  I must say, I find this generosity quite foolish.

CHASUBLE.  The heart has it’s wisdom as well as the head, Miss Prism.

GRIBSBY.  (Taking JACK’s check)  Thank you.  (To PRISM, CHASUBLE, CECILY)  Good day.  Good day.  Good day, sir.  (To ALGY.)  I hope I shall have the pleasure of meeting you again.

ALGY.    I sincerely hope not.

GRIBSBY.  Quite so.  (Exits.)

CHASUBLE.  I think we might leave the two brothers together.

MISS PRISM. Cecily, you will come with me.

CECILY.    Certainly, Miss Prism. (Exeunt CECILY and MISS PRISM, arm in arm, and DR. CHASUBLE.)

JACK.    (Shakes hands) You young scoundrel!  Algy, you must get out of this place as soon as possible. I don't allow any Bunburying here.

MERRIMAN. (Enters.) I have put Mr. Ernest's things in the room next to yours, sir. I suppose that is all right?

JACK.    What?

MERRIMAN. Mr. Ernest's luggage, sir. I have unpacked it and put it in the room next to your own.

JACK.    His luggage?

MERRIMAN.  Yes sir.  Three portmanteaus, a dressing case, two hat boxes, and a large luncheon basket.

ALGY.    (Takes off hat and puts it on table) I am afraid I can't stay more than a week this time.  (Looks after CECILY.)

JACK.    Merriman, order the dog-cart at once. Mr. Ernest has been suddenly called back to town.

MERRIMAN. Yes, sir. (Exit.)

ALGY.    What a fearful liar you are, Jack.  I haven’t been called back to town at all.

JACK.    Yes, you have!

ALGY.    I haven’t heard anyone call me.

JACK.    Your duty as a gentleman calls you back.

ALGY.    My duties as a gentleman have never interfered in my pleasures in the smallest degree.

JACK.    I can quite understand that.

ALGY.    (Turning to JACK) Jack, Cecily is a darling.

JACK.    You are not to talk of Miss Cardew like that. I don't like it.